CINCO DE MAYO 2016 Saludos mi amigos! It’s true. When I started UNM in the early 70s one of my first jobs was at the Camino Real de Ron y Marsha on Yale. I was a pearl diver and then assistant cook to Ron. The original recipes came via Marsha’s parents Mary and Tito, NM food icons. Carne adovada was a specialty. The added bonus was that I got to eat for free before and after my shift. Heaven for a poor college boy. We made fresh salsa daily and a little tequila was added. The bottle was kept on the highest cabinet. Of a morning Tito would come in the back door and (when Ron wasn’t looking) he would add a little more tequila. Then he would add a little tequila to Tito. I learned so much there about New Mexican food and have been using and tweaking those recipes for 40+ years. I’ll be siding it with a pot of pintos con cebolla, jalapeno y ajo. All will be served con mucho queso y tortillas. Jealous yet? Now that I’m retired I have plenty of free time which I manage to fill with cooking, smart media and little crafting things. The trading cards come in limited editions, sets of 24. I am always glad to hear that you are well and happy. Let’s continue to keep in touch. Bye for now. I remain Your Faithful Servant

100 words - hunny bunny was the mistake waving him off the week before too drunk when sleep loomed inviting arriving this time it was i have something to tell you but not right now watching teenage hellcats i had no clue you fucking fool that the end of everything was near i love you i love you more he had said and now i took that job and the abyss opened he has a corvette dear so on to traviata you said i wouldn’t have to watch that again now everything is different sunday morning can i remember how the doorknob works

Cassandra’s Word. The cake is baked. This will be Donnie v Hilly. Clinton will be the next President of the United States of America. Don’t get me wrong here. I’ve signed a deal with a personal devil (since you asked, Piano Mindy) and will vote the Bern in the NM primary early June. She agreed in turn to support our nominee. I am disappointed (there’s a parent word) with the rancor we are promoting in our own tribe. That reminds me of Reagan’s 11th commandment. Speak no ill. Tonight we ride. This Tribe understands that in unity there is strength.

Five unusual jobs I got paid for in no particular order. Delivering belly grams. I had my own finger cymbals, a beaded belt and silken bloomers on loan. Pearl diver then assistant cook at Camino Real. That’s where I learned to make Mary and Tito’s carne adovada. Forty plus years now I’m still working on the recipe. NM legends. Champagne King at the Roxy. Nude model for UNM art classes. Shout out here to Don Schrader. Singing maitre d’ at Ole Henry’s. I proposed to a gal in the bus station. We almost got married.

I’m aiming this like a bubble gun at the head of my friend Douglas Nilles. He’s out of Montgomery IL. He has been very kind to me. There’s a douglasnilles.com but I can’t get it to load just yet. He is experiencing quintessential success with his fabulous photographs. He and his dog Blue roam the Chicago night and also show us real street people during the day. His work makes me think. Perhaps even larger than that, he has a project where he distributes socks to people without means who can easily be overjoyed with a new pair of socks, man woman and child. Doug, I have a proposal for you. I do not mean to distract anyone from your work. You know I never sell my pieces. They are free meat. I propose a new economy where a few unique pieces of mine are available in exchange for socks. I will make you my sole and exclusive agent for marketing a few of my pieces: The Egg of Creation. Floral Box. Dali Crucifix tile in Cradle. Even something new exclusively for this endeavor. I enjoy playing Dutch uncle to Doug, poking and goading him as he travels. I’ll pay for all packaging and postage to you. Perhaps at one of your shows you can offer them in a brief auction. This economy is based solely on socks and you are the sole arbiter. Of course, it’s shameless self promotion for me, hitching my wagon to your star. Let’s do this! All in your good time. It’s said, if you want something done, assign the task to a busy man. To work is to worship.

Queer rant. I’ve lost patience with a FB friend from HS. He is the most homophobic, racist and sexist person left in my online tribe. I’m wrestling with whether to just block him and be done with that. I struggle to be open with those with whom I do not agree. He’s off on a week’s golf tour in the South. The only bitches, beaners, coons, queers and chinks he’ll encounter will be in service roles. Rosita, freshen my room. Manuel, get my bag. Ito, let’s have sushi and dim sum after I get back. Chad, get some fresh flowers in here. Mark, set up the bar and make sure we have plenty of juleps. These people are people who don’t get it. We’re already here. They’ve got the guns but we’ve got the numbers. I freely admit that I am an old white male of some privilege. We are going to die and open the way for newer voices and greater equality. I really don’t want to wait around long enough to see it complete. I’ll go to the undiscovered country well before the matinee. I know how to predict the future. Luck is really a combination of preparation and opportunity. I have a pineapple crumble in the oven. For this moment I know what the future will bring. Apre Moi Le Deluge.

Ten Children’s Stories That Grew Up 1. Jack and Phil 2. Mr. Turd’s Wild Ride 3. Little Miss Muffet Sat On Pinocchio 4. The Walrus And The Pizza Delivery Guy 5. Huge Willie Winkie 6. Winnie The Poop 7. Hey Diddle Diddle So The Cat Did 8. Humpty Humpty Dumpty 9. This Little Piggie Went To A Massage Parlor 10. Puss In Spike Heels